Conversation with my Mom:
Mom: Hi Honey! Hey, do you want Jacob's crib and changing table? Cynthia is getting rid of them.
Me: Um... for my cats?
Mom: No, stupid.... for the baby!
Me: Mom, there is no baby yet. Trust me, I will tell you as soon as there is even a hint of baby in me.
Mom: You don't have to tell me; I already know you're pregnant. I had a vision this morning.
Me: Have you considered medication?
Mom: No really!! I was brushing my teeth and suddenly I just saw a vision.... felt a vibe. Trust me. Your pregnancy woes are a thing of the past. You can cancel your IUI.
Me: You had a vision while brushing your teeth?
Mom: Yes, of course. I usually pray while brushing my teeth so I was in there, brushing and praying and this feeling came upon me and I just knew. You are totally pregnant.
Me: Well, I hope you don't take offense if I don't cancel my IUI because you share a spiritual bond with your colgate.
Mom: So do you want this crib and changing table?
Me: Sigh...
She's clearly ready for a room at bellevue but, wouldn't it be so funny to call up my RE and tell him I won't be needing an IUI because my mom's toothpaste told her I'm pregnant?
Weirdest Threat from a Student:
"I'm gonna put my cat on you like a dog."
Emotional Climate:
Bemused
Current Fears:
Rent increases
FMLA
The Prop. 8 Trial
Desert Wish:
Cookie from Zaros
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